Nutritionist & Life Coach
Meeting all requirements to call myself so (i.e. none)
Published August 31st 2012
Society is full of people making summary judgements on individuals that lack depth, refinement and show a general lack of character from the person making these grossly unjust generalisations. In that spirit I am about to make some grossly unjust generalisations about people simply from the beer that they drink. I hope you enjoy this tongue-in-cheek take on what your beverage choice says about you.
Fancy beer image available thanks to Wikipedia
Carlton Draught It's what was on tap. Pff, conformist.
You got it any old how. You believe that waxing is for surfboards and sheilas, Bob Hawke should still be PM and drink driving offences should be settled by rock-paper-scissors, best two-out-of-three; certainly not by breathalisers.
James Squire Chancer You think "Chancer" sounds way cooler than "Golden Ale".
Guinness You are a deep thinker, standing at the bar waiting for your pint o' the dark stuff to settle allows you time to contemplate the deeper things in life. Things like "do I have enough money left for another round?"
Carlton Pure Blonde/James Boag Classic Blonde/Hahn Super Dry/Etc… You just bought a gym membership and have been to spin class three times this week. In a couple of months you'll struggle to remember what the $34 being deducted from your account each fortnight is actually for.
Coopers Pale Ale You have honey in your green tea and wish that Crikey.com.au was still for free.
XXXX You are prone to beginning sentences with "I'm not racist but…"
You just bought shares in citrus fruit.
White Rabbit Dark Ale You like to try new things and will take a risk. Now put your car keys in the bowl and trust me.