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The Colonial Tramcar Restaurant

Home > Melbourne > Restaurants
by Mark Henderson (subscribe)
Freelance writer in South Melbourne.

The rolling restaurant.

It was my wife's birthday the other day and I decided to take her out for a surprise dinner. We've all been to the usual restaurants many times in our lives. Four walls, a roof, some food and, of course, stationary. It was time for something different.

The Colonial Tramcar Restaurant, for those on the slower side, is exactly what its name suggests. It's an old tram that has been converted into a restaurant and for the price of a small African country, you can book a table for the late dinner which includes a five course meal and all of your drinks.

As we waited at the collection point, the evening's entertainment kicked off with a few heavily inebriated youngsters delivering a lesson in the versatility of a certain four letter word. I found this rather amusing and was about to start laughing when a well placed jab in the ribs from my wife reminded me that we were in civilised company. For fear of any further jabs, I immediately joined the rest of the group and shook my head in disgust.

We all boarded and took our seats and the tram began its three hour tour around the CBD and inner suburbs. Our friendly waitress, Jess, welcomed everyone and took care of us for the entire evening. She served our meals which included: Tasmanian Ocean Trout; Kangaroo Fillet; Grilled Chicken Fillet and White Chocolate and Passionfruit Parfait, to name a few.

Kangaroo, trout and bubbly no complaints.

We then met Joe, our maitre d', whose job it seemed was to ply us with bubbly and keep Frank Sinatra and Andrea Bocelli playing all night. He had the ladies eating out of his hand when he sang along, perfectly, to some of the greats like "That's Amore" and "Mack the Knife". The combination of too much bubbly and the fact that we were concerned our partners would be going home with Joe, instead of us, called for some drastic action. By the end of the evening we were all singing along in a completely tone deaf manner in an attempt to win our partners back. I'm glad to say my wife did come home with me in the end.

Joe "Sinatra" and yours truly.

When the festivities did finally come to an end, my wife and I made a terrible discovery. We were both quite wobbly. Having been seated for the entire trip and lapping up the copious amounts of bubbly, wine, port and Frangelico that Joe had been dishing out, the effects only kicked in when we stood up to leave. So much for being a civilised couple. We ended up singing and giggling the whole tram ride back home.

The Colonial Tramcar Restaurant was an incredible experience. A big thumbs up to the staff on a job well done. If you haven't had an evening on the tramcar, you are missing out on a great reason to wake up with a slightly sore head.
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Why? A great evening from start to finish.
When: Lunch and dinner daily.
Where: Cnr Clarendon Street & Normanby Rd, South Melbourne VIC 3205
Cost: $82.50 - $137.50
Mark's writing style and sense of humor make me look forward to reading his articles
By Anonymous
Sunday, 18th of September @ 05:55 pm
Marky, jou lekker ding, great article! It's such a fun experience, we loved it as well. I bet you scored massive brownie points from the Gov too ;o)
By Anonymous
Tuesday, 20th of September @ 12:13 am
Great read!
By Anonymous
Wednesday, 21st of September @ 11:50 am
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