Obtain eight strips of wood, cutting them to a height of about three centimetres. The length of the strips should be tailored according to how long you wish the race to last. Nail strips of wood the same height and length to the bottom of each of the eight strips. Your completed strips should look something like an upside-down T.
Line up the eight strips in parallel fashion, allowing no more than five centimetres between each strip. These serve as buffers for your snail racing event, keeping each of the contestants on track. You will notice four lanes.
Snails are creatures of darkness and they tend to appear during or after a session of wet weather. Schedule the event for nightfall. When the rain clouds lift, collect four garden snails and place them at the beginning of the wooden race track, one per lane.
Don't fall victim to the illusion that snails are somehow threatened by the cries of your solo cheering. Snails have feelings too, which is why I always avoid stepping on them during a post-rain walk. Ensure that you chant your slimy mates across the finish line. And may the best man, I mean mollusc, win.