Surprisingly a real holiday, Public Sleeping Day is an opportunity for those of us who feel under-rested to make up sleep in public places. That's right. Luckily this great day falls on a Friday this year, so it's really just starting the weekend early, isn't it?
Unfortunately, February 28th also provides many opportunities for pickpockets, so try not to carry valuables on you if you do decide to take advantage of this exciting day. It is also sensible to do your sleeping only in places that are truly public to avoid being the victim of such crimes. This means no dark alleyways or deserted playgrounds. Remember that you observe this holiday at your own risk.
Here are some examples of ways you could celebrate this monumental day:
Sleeping in the street (Risk = 10)
Tip: Place brightly colored cones around your chosen area of repose to make yourself more visible to drivers who might otherwise crush you.
Sleeping while walking (Risk = 9)
Tip: Do not attempt this option near busy roads or anyplace pedestrians might be carrying swords.
Sleeping on the job (Risk = 8)
Tip: Requesting the permission of your boss before participating in any Public Sleeping Day festivities greatly minimizes your risk. Failure to do so could result in severe injury or even death in many cases, for example if you work for a construction or airline company.
Sleeping on your roof (Risk = 7)
Tip: Don't roll off.
Sleeping on a sidewalk (Risk = 6)
Tip: Watch out for signs with pictures of horses on them.
Sleeping on public transportation (Risk = 5)
Tip: Maybe not the most comfortable spot to sleep, public transportation certainly meets the criterion of bring public. Bring a pillow, but not your valuables.
Sleeping in a drive through (Risk = 4)
Tip: If you wear sunglasses it'll take them longer to realize you aren't awake.
Sleeping in a public library (Risk = 3)
Tip: Just don't get mugged.
Sleeping on your front porch or lawn (Risk = 2)
Tip: Watch out for anthills! If you wish to increase the risk of this option by about 4 (depending on where you live), spray yourself with sugar water before going out.
Sleeping in the front room of your home as if in a display window
Put a spotlight on yourself so the public can see that you are enjoying the holiday just as much as everyone else is. You could even set up an actual display around yourself for added effect!
(Risk = 1)
Tip: Be sure to put on sunscreen! Choosing this option could result in a great tan or a nasty sunburn if you are in direct sunlight.
Set up a live cam so you can
sleep at home in your own bed while still being sort of "in public". Or you could put a video of yourself on YouTube!
(Risk = 0)
Tip: You will be ridiculed by all serious observers of Public Sleeping Day if you actually choose this option, so don't consider it if you care at all about your reputation.
[Note: The calculated risk levels for the above activities do not account for outdoor temperature or barometric pressure. On days where these are particularly high or low these numbers may need to be adjusted. Risk levels also do not account for the possible presence of snakes, insects, or other potentially harmful creatures in your area.]
How will you celebrate Public Sleeping Day? Let us know in the comments.