Balmain, Newtown, and Surry Hills markets, all rolled into one, with a waterfront view. Sunny, 22 degrees, with springtime so close you can actually smell the fine weather. What better way to spend either the morning or the afternoon, or both, than to visit to the homestead suburb of our nation's leader? And better yet, he's not even here! Yes sir, while you're reading this, our senseless prime minister from Kirribilli House is running around the country, begging for votes, missing out on paradise in his own backyard.
With quality local artwork, seasonal clothing, and homemade jewellery stands, all spread across an acre of shady waterside views, this place is the peace and pleasure a man needs on a weekend. "Old Mate Busker" sits perched in the centre, casting his finest renditions of Pink Floyd, Jimi Hendrix, and The Beatles, as the aroma of freshly roasted coffee drifts on a gentle breeze. How's the serenity, Darl? So much serenity...
But the outstanding jewel at Kirribilli Markets is the famous new Sino-Vietnamese pork roll cookery - known simply as "POKLOL". The word itself, as I understand it, is an old Chinese proverb, whispered across the mainland since the ancient Xia Dynasty, for over four thousand years. It translates roughly to "the Chinese art of perfecting a popular Vietnamese dish, and serving it to hungry white people who pay seven durrah".
The finest hot food vendor this side of the harbour
Don't be fooled by cheap imitations, especially the one nearby run by the local whitefella. He's not fooling anyone - and the queues speak for themselves. Cashing in off the back of POKLOL's meteoric success, these shameless wannabes are peddling some very poor substitutes. Do yourself a favour and go for the real deal. Be warned though - demand is very high for an authentic POKLOL. I'd advise you to get in early as they often sell out by 1:30pm. Desperate POKLOL lovers are often seen rushing to the cheap knock-offs, just minutes after missing out on the real deal. Bland chilli sauce spills down their shirts, while tears of disappointment spill down their cheeks.
POKLOL has to be one of the best $7 meals you will find in Sydney (or make it $10 for a combo with homemade lime-o-nade). And to top it off, the cherry on the cake - their famous "Gay Ol' Time". A modern twist on the classic Aussie "Golden Gaytime" ice cream, this masterpiece dessert sells out even quicker than the hot food. I was damn fortunate to have grabbed the very last one on my first trip down there. Best $5 my mate ever spent on me...
So bring ya kids, bring ya wives, and bring ya husbands, coz they POKLOL'ing everybody out here!