Disclaimer: The following pranks are to be performed with the knowledge that said prankster may in turn be evicted from the workplace.
They may also lead to future pranking on the prankster down the track, starting an all office 'Prank War.'
Are you the person in your office that people love to prank?
Do you frequently let out a sarcastic 'Ha-ha guys' when you find your computer in a toilet cubicle?
Then read on, because you can do so much better than that. And chances are, your prank will be so awesome, you won't even get fired for it. You might just get a warning.
1. The 'Surprise' prank:
This first prank involves everyone in the office, and works best if you have a large boardroom.
You want to wait for the prankee to go on a holiday. Two weeks would be great, because it would make the prank more believable.
On the morning the prankee is due back to work, you want everyone in the office early. About 3am just to be safe.
As you will doing a bit of hard work at such a ridiculous hour, you might want to suggest that the youngest person in the office buys each and every person a coffee. That way, everyone will be perky and ready to participate in the prank.
If the youngest person in the office refuses, tell them 'that's fine, but you'll be pranked next'. And if the youngen' has seen your impressive pranking resume, now they will be sure to pick up all the coffees.
The next few hours are going to involve a lot of moving of furniture, and also sign making.
Move every piece of furniture in the office into the boardroom. If this is impossible in your office, then just move everything that is within view when you step in the office door. You want the place to look vacant.
Allocate someone to be the Sign Maker. Get them to make up a sign that says "This business has moved, and will not be returning".
Stick this on the front door.
Then, get the Sign Maker to create another sign that says "No, really, we aren't here anymore".
Tie this one from the roof so it is right in the prankee's face as they walk in the door. This extra sign makes the move even more realistic, because no doubt the prankee said 'Yeah right', in their head after reading the first sign.
At this point, you should all be hiding in the boardroom with all of the office furniture and supplies.
"But we can't even see his/her reaction?" I hear you say.
Sure you can.
Teddy bears are the obvious selection to hide a video camera in. So we aren't going to use one of those.
What you want to do is grab a small video camera, in which you will hide in something a little more inconspicuous.
Cut the top off a large pumpkin and hollow it out, as if you were making a jack-o-lantern. Pop the video camera in there, and put the top back on.
Place it somewhere that will be in view of the prankee.
This way, you will have a copy of it and can play it at all office meetings and christmas parties in the future.
I would say it will take a good ten minutes of pondering by the prankee, so just sit tight and try not to giggle. You don't want them to hear you all piled up in the boardroom.
When the prankee wanders into the boardroom, you all yell 'SURPRISE'.
Pointing and laughing also works well here.
And maybe just to finish off the prank, if you have a water pistol handy, you might want to fill it with tropical punch cordial and squirt a little on his / her shirt.
2. The 'Set Up' prank:
Here is another prank that involves the whole office. It is a bit awful, but that is why it is going to work as a prank.
Send out a bulk email to all staff, except for the prankee. You want to explain that you're hoping to prank Jim, (let's call him Jim) so could everyone please do the following.
Whenever you speak to Jim, say things like "Too bad", or "I'm sorry man, unlucky", or "Sad to see you go", or "It's been
great". And be sure to use a sympathetic tone.
When Jim asks why, pretend as if you thought he knew, and backtrack saying "Oh, what, nothing. It's nothing". Say this
in an 'I'm trying to be upbeat' tone.
Be sure to have this going on for at least 3 hours, causing Jim a load of wonder, and / or worry.
You'll then want to get your boss to call Jim into his office. When Jim gets to the boss's office, be sure they close the door.
This is the height of the prank, where Jim fears all of his worries are about to be realised.
It is at this point that the boss then produces a giant cupcake, with the words 'We got you good' glazed on top.
Jim can then enjoy the cupcake, and smile to himself that he was so silly to have fallen for this prank.
Which brings me to my next point.
3. Your signature:
You know how Zorro leaves a 'Z' whenever he has been somewhere? You will want to leave something memorable after performing any prank.
As stated above, my signature is the cupcake with the words 'We got you good' written on it.
I feel the cupcake says it all, whilst also getting forgiven at the same time, and hopefully avoiding any retaliation pranking in the future.
4. The 'mini' prank:
If you don't feel the need to go to these extremes, that's okay. We don't all have it in us to be the Master of all Pranksters. So how about these?
- Grab a David Hasselhoff calender, preferably from the 80's. Cut out pictures of the prankee's head, and stick them over every Hasselhoff head. Put the calender up in the kitchen for all to see.
- Take a packet of Oreos and remove the white insides. Replace this with toothpaste, and put a plate of your new creations on the desk of the prankee at around 3pm. The time at which you would gladly like a free plate of Oreo's.
- Tell the prankee that the work christmas party is a Disney theme. Be sure to hold your event at a high profile place in which there will be camera's and media.
So, how about it?
8-5 can be a drag, so why not put someone around you in a situation that's going to be laughed at around the office for years to come.