Contact sports may not be your cup of tea, but if you're looking to do something physical on the weekend, grab some golf clubs and treat yourself to a game of golf at the Keilor Golf Course. This particular course has a total of 18 holes. Not everyone is Tiger Woods or Stuart Appleby, so there's no pressure to be a golfing hero. Put yourself down for nine holes if you believe you lack the endurance or skill for 18 holes. This is a good idea, especially if you haven't played for a while because you'll feel less sore the next day.
Depending on your ballpark, pardon the pun, Keilor Golf Course offers a fairly challenging game for inexperienced golfers but may be considered a piece of cake by professionals. Needless to say, each individual would have a different game of golf. Perhaps anyone would sigh with relief at the spacious grass greens that the course primarily consists of.
You may be vexed at the sight of the occasional sand bunker, but that should be the least of your problems. Be aware that this place is very open and the winds from the Keilor plains will show no mercy. Stormy breezes are normally unpredictable, despite calm forecasts. Your game can be changed in an instant and a significantly greater level of skill may be demanded.
Be sure to grab a pie from the canteen at the conclusion of your game. This is always a positive reinforcement regardless of your performance on the green. Just don't leave your food unattended because the local crows have been known to swoop down and rob you of your much needed post-golf sustenance. These scavengers tend to prefer warm sausage rolls among other things, so be on your guard.
On arrival at your game of golf, try not to park just outside the course; allow for a few rows of empty spaces. One year I saw a man tee off at the first hole and his ball struck the branch of a nearby gumtree and landed heavily on the windscreen of a car parked too close. The odds of that happening are probably the same as getting a hole in one.