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How to Tell You've Been Bamboozled

Home > Everywhere > Singles and Dating
by Rania H (subscribe)
Rania Hussein
Published February 2nd 2013
Love is a battlefield and like all battles there's always a party that signs a treason treaty for its own pleasure and extra benefits. So since all is fair in love and war, I suggest you get your eye goggles, a trained dog, printer/scanner and your crossbow or a big hammer-thrash just in case.

To avoid being the next Sandra Bullock, Sienna Miller, Uma Thurman, Liz Hurley and Jennifer Aniston - skim through these little signs
to find out if he's a keeper or belongs to a shredder.

But first let's tackle which style of double-dealing he's really playing:

Aside from Mr. Winky Winkerson with his every minute head pop turn towards any walking female being and the sudden urge to head to the restroom, which is code for a rocket gal passing by and he has to catch her; there are always uncanny styles that men invent to double-deal you and for what reason - it's in the genes with some exceptions of course.

There's the cyber gigolo; he has an account in every chat room site with a picture of his biceps as a profile picture and no male friends, but a whole lot of cosmopolitan female icons. He likes to constantly send sincere internet generated affections to whomever profile appeals to him. According to his own point of view; this is not cheating as long as he didn't actually have a direct physical contact with her.

Bluetooth pixie; his cellphone's Bluetooth is always turned on despite the high exposure to mobile viruses, with his mobile number as a nickname. And of course doing the same thing of sending a short charming description of him to whomever BT name is much more attractive.

Work cherub; it doesn't need elaboration, he likes to hit on his female colleagues especially the work-pressured ones. So he appears to be their knight and shining armour and each day at work is just another romantic chance for them to reunite.

All-time-Romeo; he can effortlessly connect to any woman he encounters anywhere and everywhere no matter what. He sends endless mind exploding, dreamy quotes on the hour, every hour and pays abrupt stopovers, making each and every one of them feel like she's the one and only babe.

Mirror, mirror on the wall; he is so much into himself, thinking he is better than everyone and that he is the best living thing you've ever had. Since he's so narcissistic, he finds that it's his god given right for you and every other girl to serve his needs.

Analgesic; you're having a bit of a rough patch and instead of working things out, he unintentionally drifts away for comfort and before you know it…he's hooked.

Born this way; since his early years, he's been the Sinbad of affairs, one night stands and flings. You can't just assume he's going to quit cold-turkey.

Now put your goggles on and let's get down to business;
There are many signs that could give your man away; of course there are the most common yet obvious signs like:

Drifting away; where he finds comfort in more alone time whether at home or outside.
The sudden disappearance of the three words "I Love You".
He doesn't pay that much attention anymore; no matter what you do; had a new haircut, new dress, a killing outfit - he just doesn't see you.
The late night hangouts and the every time cellphone battery-low coincidence.
Making up fights for nothing.
- The consecutive weekend work-cycles.

But there are some hidden morse code beeps that you need to crack for earlier damage patch-up:

-The abrupt fascination of closed doors; he is now fond of staying at his room for hours and sometimes for days with the door closed, nothing and no one can get him out except the bathroom or the fridge.

-The startled entrance; whenever you open the door, he in a split of a second shuts off his phone or puts his laptop on sleep mode. And starts making annoyed faces the longer you stay.

-The PIN syndrome; everything he owns starts growing passcodes and secret words which make it harder for you to use or snoop around; his cell phone for instance is so special that he changes its password every week just to make sure. You can try saving his car's license plate, it might work.

-The floral phase; you'd find him coming home from work or some friends' hangout with flowers in his hands, of course he will tell you it's for you with no occasion to relate to ... romantically enough, it's a gift from one of his gals.

-Too good to be true; he criticises every little thing you do even the way you breathe air; yes it can come to that.

-Mystery girl; he keeps talking about a certain colleague at work with issues and how he stood up to his boss for her sake, he shows you pictures of her in a group meeting. He also throws a couple of fraud info about her like; she's married with kids or she has a boyfriend and moving away. But don't feel sorry for her, Google her out.

-The lawyer act; whenever you enquire about something or seem suspicious, he gets very defensive and gives you the silent treatment for days with the words " don't you trust me at all!!" on his lips. You'd eventually feel guilty trying to shake these feelings away and act as nice as possible, but I am telling you stop digging - lay low and things will fall into place.

-He loves me…he loves me not; one minute he is flattering your beauty and the other he just can't stand your voice. He is moody all the time and this is driving you crazy.

-A table for two; you always get across receipts of different restaurants for two in his car, at his drawer, in one of his suits' pockets and he always comes up with a different explanation like it's a computer glitch, it's a business dinner or I invited my friend,yeah right!

-You've got SMS; the unlimited beep alerts on his cellphone that he's keen to answer. You'll ask out of curiosity and he'll tell you he's one of his friends helping him in something big, which is totally not.
-A galaxy far far away; he is trying to persuade you to spend some quality time with your friends, stay the weekends with your parents or send you and your kids to his parents for a month under the so called family retreat. The further the distance the better for him, so I suggest taking his advice and leave the kids with your parents and start spying.

-Temporary amnesia; he forgets about your birthday, anniversary and doesn't bother getting a Valentine's Gift and to top it all, he spends Valentine's Day away "stuck in a work cycle"…as if! And returns home with a frown.

-Snakes and ladders; he takes too long when taking the trash out - it's just down the street - where could he be all that time!! He's buying cigarettes from - mmm China! And the very lame excuses of; opening his work laptop in the car, he has to take important calls downstairs or in the balcony. There is also the sudden disappearance without further notice where you can't really find him in the house for an hour or so.

-Love in bloom; he is listening to romantic heart throbbing songs that doesn't relate to you in anyway, yet he is singing along like a jukebox.

-Your body can betray you; there are certain facial and body expressions that blows his whole under-handing plan up like; palm sweating, roving eyes, sponge bob smile, quivering Adams apple, constant headache and the upright sit with the attentive ears.

Last but not least, your gut feeling, don't ever underestimate this special power, believe me women can sense these things even before it starts and you're always right on the money. But don't make a big deal out of it just wait and turn your cautious lights on.
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Your Comment
good luck , well done ya Rania you are so talented
by roush (score: 1|13) 3054 days ago
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