If murdering plants was a crime, I'd be a serial killer with my own show on Netflix. With this in mind, my recommendations can be regarded only as those of a homicidal horticulturist who's found a couple of botanical nemeses that appear to be invincible.
Everlasting Love Frangipani (
Plumeria pudica)
This is the rolled gold standard bearer of easy care Brisbane plants. Be it in a large pot or in the ground, even I have somehow managed to make this popular species of evergreen frangipani thrive.
With a splash of water and nature-provided sunlight, Everlasting Love is capable of flowering for large parts of the year in Brisbane's biome. At a maximum height of about five metres, it is easily pruned into your required shape and makes an excellent privacy screen.
To top it all off, I've even managed to grow these from my own primitive propagation technique - cut a bit off and whack it in the ground. This is the sort of plant that makes me think I'm a decent gardener - if only for a split second.
Xanadu (
Philodendron xanadu)
Not sure if the CSIRO has officially deemed this survivor a weed but it sure grows like one. It's a long way from rare - think council nature strips and roundabouts - but that's because it is genuinely bulletproof.
While it's not a flower producer, its evergreen foliage is attractive and indomitable. Growing to about 1.5 high and wide, it works well as a keep-the-weeds-away low screen in any size garden.
And maybe best of all, planting one of these provides a great little ongoing tribute to the great ONJ - may she RIP.
Resilience Lilly Pilly (
Syzigium australe 'Resilience')
The name attracted me to this one if only because resilience appears to be the quality most lacking in our twenty-first century, alleged digital paradise. Fortunately, it lives up to what it says on the label.
Like the Xanadu, this is not some rarity but a Brisbane commoner that seems intent on taking over the front yards of suburbia. Growing to around four metres high and two metres wide, the Resilience is as close to the perfect hedging plant as you'll find.
Its glossy leaves can be pruned to any shape you like, eventually creating a dense, brick-like screen. And don't forget that this particular variety of lilly pilly is psyllid resistant. That would be even more impressive if I knew what a psyllid is.
