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Death Star Canteen Comedy Night at CR Dirty Secrets

Home > Melbourne > Bars | Comedy | Nightlife
by Krissy Philipp (subscribe)
Krissy is a Comedian and Writer and good time gal gadding about Melbourne town. Visit my facebook page at
Published July 26th 2014
Pssst! Want to know a Dirty Secret?

Last night I sipped a fine, warm Cognac from a brandy balloon and supped a red velvet chocolate biscuit before being served a generous helping of belly laughs at Caz Reitops' Dirty Secrets Bar, Death Star Canteen comedy night. So do you want a real treat too?

I've got to tell you this swanky spot is a diamond in the rough, nestled in the heart of Smith Street, Collingwood along the tram line just where the 86 turns into Gertrude Street.

Dirty Secrets is a beautiful roaring 20s inspired cocktail lounge secluded, inviting and full of delicious surprises. Welcoming, attentive staff are happy to give wise counsel on your tipple. Stand by the open fire in winter or perch on a stool out front on a balmy night to watch the world go by. This fabulous venue offers a vast array of fairly priced top shelf drinks, featured cocktails and fine beers on tap served lovingly by the barmen who also pull a fine coffee.

But there's more to this blue stone delight than meets the eye. Wander downstairs to 'The Vault' any Wednesday night from 8.30pm (happy hour Wed-Fri 5-7pm) and be treated to a mix of professional comedians and emerging comics performing live stand up.

Big names have included Cal Wilson, Demi Lardner, Tegan Marie Higginbotham, Simon Keck, Daniel Connell and Simon Taylor to name a few, rolling out the freshest and funniest laughs this side of the Yarra river. The basement function room is also available on other nights by request.

If you are after a stylish 1920s cocktail bar for a relaxed drink and to share a hearty laugh, Dirty Secrets – Death Star Canteen is a rare joy. This joint is dedicated to your pleasure.

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When: Wed: 8:30 pm - 11:00 pm
Where: 80 Smith Street, Collingwood 3066
Cost: 5 Dollar Entry
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