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Aqua Australian Tour 2014

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'Turn Back Time' to the 90s
Relive the decade that taste forgot at Aqua's just-announced Greatest Hits tour. Any self-respecting nineties baby will remember the Danish pop group who enjoyed unprecedented success in Australia. Other than the people who write those pesky "worst songs of all time" lists, everyone loves Aqua's 1997 breakout hit, Barbie Girl:

Those of us who were children upon Barbie Girl's release may think of it fondly as a song about their favourite toy, but anyone listening to the song without the barrier of childhood naiveté will realise that it is sexually charged. Apparently, they were not talking about playing dress-ups with dolly in the line "undress me anywhere".

aqua barbie girl
If you did not own a copy of this single 17 years ago, you should be very ashamed of yourself. Image: Wikipedia.

I can't have been the only one who would watch The Aqua Diary: The Official Aquarium Home Video VHS over and over, transfixed by Lene's tinny voice and Soren's gravity-defying spiky hair.

How did his hair get so spiky? Fun fact: Lene and Soren are married now.

From watching the video enough times that it is permanently etched into my memory, I can tell you that the phenomenal success of Barbie Girl was preceded by their failed band Joyspeed. Their first release as Aqua was not in fact their most famous song, but was repetitive dance track Roses Are Red:

Apparently, they did not stop after Barbie Girl. Aqua was actually creating songs until 2011, although their last charted song in Australia was in 2000. Hopefully they will stick to playing old favourites, such as Lollipop and Doctor Jones (only diehard Aqua fans will realise that those are two separate songs). If Aqua does not play your favourites, do not complain to them too loudly, as Lene is handy with a rifle- apparently she was the second-best shooter in the Norwegian army in her past life.

Aqua's whirlwind Australian tour kicks off in Brisbane on October 31, then goes to Sydney on November 1, Adelaide on November 2, and Melbourne on November 3 before ending in Fremantle on November 5.

Tickets go on sale on Thursday the 2nd of September, with pre-sale tickets available from Friday 29 August. Tickets for Brisbane, Adelaide and Fremantle are being handled by Oztix, Sydney is taken care of by Ticketek, and Melburnians can buy tickets from Ticketmaster. Prices vary by location, but are in the realm of $70 per person for general admission. Some shows also have a meet and greet option for about $160 per person.
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Why? To keep the nineties alive.
Cost: About $70 per ticket.
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