As a single girl, I like to think of myself more as fabulous as opposed to desperate, the latter only an exception when Valentine's Day rolls around and my mother looks at me expectantly as if expecting me to announce that her future son-in-law is about to walk through our door right that moment.
I have been single for a while now, and no regrets at that. I enjoy it, and I have a great lifestyle. The only pressure I face is from my law studies - and my mother's constant matchmaking - apart from that, my life is a mix of friends, networking, socials, volunteering and mindless gossip over cocktail hour.
Valentine's day for the single girl can be like a national holiday if you know how to celebrate it correctly. Here's how to deflect criticism, prevent blind dates from going sour, and not ending up spending time alone at home in front of the telly watching an ABC V-day special.
It's the thought that counts.
A quick Wikipedia reference yielded the information that V-day is actually known as Saint Valentine's Day and was romanticized by Geoffrey Chaucer in the era of courtly love. Let's face it, old Chaucy was a 14th century poet who had no idea what he was talking about when it came to women and I know this because I had to sit through an entire semester of Chaucer-torture at one point. This automatically disqualifies his authority on the subject.
What could actually qualify as an authority is - do not judge me here - Tina Fey's character in Baby Mama. If you have not watched the movie, do it just for her positive attitude. Even though Fey adds comic relief to her serious situation of not being able to conceive, her positive attitude of sticking encouraging post-its on her bathroom cabinet and deflecting negativity from her surroundings is a refreshing change to the single woman stereotype. If more single women adopted her brazenly comic approach to life, chocolate suppliers would lose a large portion of their sales which I would assume come from women such as myself.
Chocolate and V-Day. These two elements go together like Troilus and Criseyde, Romeo and Juliet, and Hamlet and Ophelia where one almost cannot function without the other and they all end in tragedies. Nevermind the elaborate plot by Hallmark to sell more greeting cards by playing on V-Day's syrupy sentiments, I say we fight the Nestles and Herscheys for making us gain four pounds in a single weekend. Candy companies' real target is not the male sycophant who is going to spend $30 on a single box of chocolate for his girlfriend to put out, instead it is the single woman who cannot deal with the idea of being single, and buys an entire trolley. Not any more, we say, fists and all.
Don't worry too much about trying to find a date just for the 14th, or signing up for a singles event on that day. What is really the difference whether you go for a mixer on the 14th of February or on the 22nd? Is cupid really going to shoot his arrow into that disinterested guy you have been talking to for the last ten minutes and magically make him fall in love with you, sweep you off your feet and marry you in an instant? No freaking way. The best way to get anywhere near scoring a date and keeping your standards high is to pace yourself by attending various mixers throughout the year. Do go for that mixer on V-Day though, and be reminded that there are plenty of fish in the sea who are single and happy. Most importantly, enjoy yourself.
Finally, surround yourself with happy and contended people. Our friends influence us vastly and we become the company we keep. Having toxic friends who constantly complain about how lonely they are will only result in these emotions rubbing off on you. Happy people tend to gain more attention and admiration, which will eventually end positively. Embrace the single woman, treat yourself well and command the respect and love that you deserve.
I know what you mean when you talk about a match making mum! I cannot seem to agree with one thing, that we should fight Nestle or Hersheys. Lives of single women would be worse if we didnt have chocolates. I mean come on what if no guy is sweet enough to buy them for us, I know every time I devour a tiny hersheys kiss not having a date on V-day (which I did not this year) wont hurt as much. Even if only momentarily!
By Badhon M - senior reviewer Wednesday, 6th of July @ 05:33 am
Hahaha, I think I might agree with you on that! I can't really live without the chocolate myself. Damn the addiction...I'll just cave in like every year ;)
By Ketki - senior reviewer Wednesday, 28th of September @ 03:26 am